King of Mixed Signals

this isn't an "After"

this isn't what you want it to be.
this isn't what i want it to be.

you still want me, i know it. otherwise we wouldn't have our little arrangement.
yet you push me away,
you say you don't want it to be like this.
you say you can't go that far anymore, because there's still an attachment.
in plain english: you're still not over me
but you still let me leave.
and then you say you'll probably regret it later.
because we both still want each other.
we can't stand to be apart.
yet here we are, standing arm's length away.

nobody's willing to move

i don't want to let you see me like this
you can't know how you effect me

you embrace me, arms wrapped around me tightly
we share our goodbyes

you know what you've done.

you tell me to call you when i get home, so you can rest assured i made it home okay
you don't want to hurt me, i'm guessing
you don't want to mess it up,
you don't want me to have to deal with things like that

You don't realize what you've already done

i'm left here broken, heart blackened by the flame that used to burn
carrying baggage i'll never leave behind

i'm getting tired and i need somewhere to begin

and  i want to give you an ultimatum, i want to make you tell me straight, if you still want me or not. but i fear what will happen to me if you say i have to go. that will be a day i won't ever forget. time heals all wounds, except those that distance themselves from memories. this is a pain i feel in the simplest things.
and still, when you're near, i'm okay. you melt away my reality, and let me live in my fairytale.